admiring Viktor

I have the slightest idea what you have in mind with that title but NO. I am not interested in him. And NO, I am definitely not going to involve myself with some sort of political turn-coatism or anything similar to that.

But bear with me on this one. I really have something to say. (shucks! parang sir arao lang yan)

Viktor is currently the Vice Chairperson of the University Student Council. A student from the College of Social Sciences and Philosophy, he ran under Alyansa party and won by almost 50 votes only.

From this point forward, it must be noted that there exists a strong sense of party affiliation in college politics, most especially in USC and for this reason alone, members of my political party is quite antagonistic of him.

There had been issues against him even at this point, accusations that his party conspires in dominating the LCC elections and other critical decisions the alliance will have to face. However, allow me to say so, most of these accusations are but rumors.

During LCC meetings, there were things I've noticed about him that are admirable.

As a convener, he seems so objective and neutral. There seems to be no trace of bias on him. He never mentioned Stand UP, Alyansa or Kaisa (well, he shouldn't. that's really quite off) He never favored any college, not even his own. He always let everyone speak up. It's like he's just there, facilitating and that's it.

He catches every points raised during meetings and is able to reiterate each one.

During the deliberations of the LCC statement against the Tuition and Other Fees Increase, certain arguments were faulty and irrelevant but he was able to debunk them in such a way that it is not offensive and partisan.

Moreover, he insists on keeping the meetings on focus, even when his own party mates are deviating the discussion.

As I see it, Viktor is Alyansa but his actions seem to only be directed towards the interests of the students. (pardon me for saying this as early as now, but that's how i see it from an almost outsider's point of view) And for this reason alone, Viktor has earned my respect.


All these makes me think of our council. Why can't our chairperson be like that? Why can't party affiliations fade away and direct every action towards student interest? Why can't he put the students first before himself? Why can't he be objective and at least try to listen to other perspectives as well? Why can't he not prioritize his party mates so that we can all work together for the benefit of the students? Why can't he do it? Why can't I live in a perfect world where unity in diversity exists?

Why not?

LCC elections

The League of College Councils (LCC), an alliance of college councils which serves as a consultative body of the University Student Council (USC) similar to the CoR, held its election for two positions, the secretary and public information officer (PIO), yesterday afternoon. The School of Information and Library Science Student Council (SLIS SC) was elected as the secretary and College of Mass Communication Student Council (CMC SC) as the public information officer.

The election was actually a weird experience. The CMC SC (at least six of us: Ayeen, Gem, Marian, Airah, Carlos and I) was actually confident in winning the position since we were the only ones nominated. At the same time, CMC SC had always been the PIO since the training fits the position very well. And if I may say so, this was actually planned by members of the political party which adds even more to the confidence level. (hala, nag-bakla si ateh)

Apparently, there was another nominee, the National College of Public Administration and Governance Student Council (NCPAG SC).

So what's wrong?

My instincts tell me there is some sort of conspiracy going on. Being a Stand UP dominated council, (not Stand UP council, know the difference) it may be possible that the "other" party would rather grab it, being the position vital in making statements and press releases. (yeah, I know. It's just politics and all)

We were asked to present our general program of action. Being that confident, we actually didn't prepare a detailed list of plans. However, with another nominee, we really had to flaunt our abilities, which includes our connections with a long list of media organizations. The only thing NCPAG SC had to say to redeem themselves is "if you want someone new."

I got agitated with the statement.

I can't blame people for looking for alternatives to those considered as institutions in politics. I myself voted for Ramon Ilagan as mayor with the same reason in mind. However, by experience in college politics, it somehow connotes the idea of leaning towards apathy. Students usually look for alternatives because they think Stand UP is too proactive. So they would vote candidates from other parties, ending up only to regret their votes. Then they would vote for Stand UP for the next few years until they start to look for alternatives again. It has been a cycle.

It is because of this same cycle that I am now faced the battle of principles. And I definitely am not enjoying it.


I can easily let go of my angst on the council and "his" principles. I just hope students would no longer base their votes on just looking for alternatives but for the abilities and attitudes each person possess.

As it turns out, 12 out of 14 councils voted for CMC SC. (well, that's not bad at all) What makes this election interesting are the reasons given by other councils for voting us, that it's not about being an institution in this position, but the abilities and training of CMC students that makes us qualified for the position.

Now that we got the position of PIO, everything else will be internal.

kids in a Montessori school

Today, our class in EDSP 122, Montessori and Other Approaches to Early Childhood Education, had a field trip to Maria Montessori Foundation (MMF) in Ayala Heights, Alabang. Existing for 28 years now, MMF is considered as one of the most authentic Montessori schools in the country.

We were assigned by pairs to observe children ages 3 to 6 years old in class.

Two kids, Iris and Alfonse, caught my attention. They got animal puzzles in their hands, placed the pieces on table where I was.

Iris: Wait for me.
Alfonse: Ok. I'll go slowly.

They placed their last pieces at the same time. Afterwards, they got up, put the puzzles back in its place and took a new material, this time, picture cards of the different parts of the turtle and horse. After enumerating the parts correctly, the teacher asked them to get their writing boards t work on a sort of diagnostic test. Iris took their colored pencils while Alfonse got papers and their writing board.

As they were writing, Iris's pencil broke and so she grabbed one of Alfonse's pencils. As it seemed like, Alfonse was quite annoyed by Iris's grabbing and thus, conflict start. Still working...

Alfonse: You're always making me sad.
Iris: People always make me happy... except my mom... except you.
Alfonse: You're making me want to go. You've been my friend for many days.
Iris: You're still my friend. Only a few people are my friends.
Alfonse: I'll share you my toys.

And they're happy again. They went on to talk about Harry Potter and Transformers. Iris was able to finish her work first.

Iris: Can I wait for you?
Teacher: Iris, put away your things. You're going home soon.
Iris: I have to keep my things now. I'll b going home soon.
Alfonse: Fine. Bye. Not friend.
Iris: No. (she comes closer to Alfonse) I love you.

Teacher calls Iris. Iris hugs her teacher and says goodbye to everyone.

reaction on the statement

(angst, angst, angst)

We were sitted on the floor at the film lobby one afternoon. Marian told her story of a time she interviewed a broadcast media practitioner (I choose not to name the person). After the interview proper, the braodcaster asked her if she was from the CMC student council. With Marian answering yes, the broadcaster commented on the statement we released against the Human Security Act (HSA) of 2007 saying that we obviously don't know what we're doing. It lacks research but it is however forgivable since we are mere students.

Excuse me. If I may...

Do not talk to us about research. We are students of the College of Mass Communication. We know what is research. It is what we do. Omitting research is by far a disgrace not only to the university that has taught us to be the best that we can be but also to the public we serve.

We know very well the implications of our actions, that our words may be accused of inciting "terror", if the Gloria administration in particular wants us, the vigilant ones to be arrested. It is for this very reason alone we must be certain of every criticism we pose.

This "terror" we chose to ignore, the risks we are ready to take.

We should not be antagonized for our actions. To be explicit about it, the statement is humiliation to media practitioner who chose to sit and be quiet when students, those younger and inexperienced if I may say so, chose to stand up and fight for the same right we all should be concerned about, the fight to press freedom.

I would rather see students of this college proactive than passive. It is better to risk making mistakes and apologize in the end than to regret that we should have done something when we still have the chance.

I remain standing and will continue to uphold this statement.

remembering a friend

Last week, I saw myself in a dream bumping onto an old friend of mine. In this dream, he looked very happy. When I woke up, I realized it was a day after his birthday. I texted him, he never answered back. It must have been one of the many numbers I had saved of him, or he never got it.

But seriously, it's been a long time since I talked to this friend of mine. We went to the same high school and being a year older than I am, we forcibly became partners in a waltz performance during the prom. We've already experience much stepping on each other's feet, teasing, and reprimands but from that day on still, we became good friends.

We attended the same university for a year. He finished his degree in University of Sto. Tomas (UST), while I transfered to UP after a year.

He never missed my birthday and to that, I felt really bad for not making it in time for his.

I remember those times when I needed books but I always fail to get one. He would either lend me his or ask one of his blockmates to lend me theirs. He gave me advice on professors and how I could earn the highest grades possible.

There were also times when I feel down and he'd suddenly text the most appropriate messages even when he doesn't know what exactly is going on.

He's actually the perfect example of a friend I often underestimate and ignore because of his physical inexistence in my environment when in essence ha has always been there, quiet and unnoticeable.

That has always been my mistake, to give too much attention to people existing physically in the world I move around at the moment in such a way that when they leave this sort of space, I end up finding myself at lost. Probably this is why I have some kind of defense mechanism when people attempt to invade my personal bubble (sana tama ang gamit ko di ba? comm theories!), even when I would consciously allow them to.

I never learn still. Good things there are people like him, friends who never leave even when you tend to forget them. I guess this is one of God's myseteries in our lives.

things I must have forgotten

disclaimer: if you're not into drama, don't read. may actually be boring...

After all those months of total conflict and angst, at last I can now say I'm quite getting over it.

No, the conflict has definitely not resided. As long as our dear chairperson never detach party affliations from council affairs and start being professional, I doubt if conflicts will ever reside. But that's beside the point now.
I'm actually feel better now (after so long).

I guess I must have found some sort of renewed strength after I've talked with my new cell grop leader, Ate Mai/ Val (people call her different names; Mai by my Christian org, Campus Crusade for Christ (CCC), Val by my college; I refer to her as Ate Mai).

After Ate Emmylou resigned as a staff of CCC and enrolled in a bible school, I honestly felt quite lost. Being that individualistic person who tries to solve problems on mere self effort, getting out of the box and start depending on another person and then being left alone again makes my coping up stage even longer. But of course, I could never tell her that. Selfish me. Come to think of it, I may actually just be needing someone to actually be "there" everytime I need to release every unstable feeling my environment provokes me. And for quite some time, I was actually back to my individualistic effort of coping up until ---

I never actually knew Ate Mai that much except that she graduated with a degree on Broadcast Communication and that she is the one who handles target area prayer group for CMC (a group of students who pray for a certain college to come and know Jesus). However, I can really say she had always been there, even before the elections. Her little efforts of texting me for updates on the election, on how I was doing after Bikoy lost (which by the way, I seldom respond to) actually meant nothing to me until now.

It's been two months since school started. Bible study should have been that long too but I never had the chance to attend even one, much more, I never had the opportunity to officially meet Ate Mai as my new cell leader.

And so, we decided to meet for lunch today. And yes, I told her my stories, ALL of them, from my family history, to my how I started to get involved in college politics, how my experience was with my political party, and our church ministry, the free pre-school we are running, and my dreams of becoming a SPED teacher.

I could never forget what she told me.

Ever since I ran for college politics (as Journalism Representative two years ago), she, together with the CMC target area prayer group, never stopped praying for me and Micah (the other Journalism Representative, also a Christian). She said they knew we needed strength to stand up.

She also heard the story of a drunk session during an induction of an organization through a culturally shocked first year Journalism student. This freshman told her that one of the drunk people commented on my strong personal convictions against drinking and smoking so they never really attempted to invite me to join them because I would never do such. "At some point, I felt proud kasi ok ka pa rin pala," were the next few words Ate Mai told me.

The next module for the bible study was designed to people who has commited some work for CCC, discipleship, target area, witnessing, at least something. However, she also saw the things I'm already commited to. There will be no pressure for me. Instead, "I want to be of service to you. I want to help you."

I've been longing to hear those words from anyone, that he/she cares not for what I do for them as a member of the council, that after all the personal attacks on my integrity and feeling degraded, I can still find people who looks through those things.

The trap had been so deep, I thought I could never get out alive. I tried crying out for help, no one seems to listen. There were signs of people hearing me but they too couldn't think of how to get me out. On mere solo effort, I try my best to escape when in fact had I looked harder, I would have seen that thin line lowered down to save me. It's a small effort, but I know it's enough to get me away from an almost death trap I've fallen into.

That afternoon, I decided to attend Movement Life (ML), a small fellowship every Friday organized by CCC. As I entered the Student Center and saw no one I knew except Ate Mai and Ate Neri, I actually felt relieved. Had I been used to being on top, I forgot how it felt like to be down below, that life when nobody knew who I was, when I could just stay as quiet as I want to be without anybody caring that I be such, that life of a follower and do nothing but to sit in a corner and watch. I never felt so simple and yet grateful.

It must have been a while since I had a chance to talk to God without doing or worrying anything else. I never felt so grateful.

I am going to be better.

There are new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness.
It's been a while since I've seen the dawn.
But this day, I will be experiencing the refreshing moment.
At long last.

reaction paper slash balahurang papel

I really don’t know how I was able to conceive such notion, but every time a teacher assigns a reaction paper, I always feel like it’s one of those joke papers I have to do, something I wouldn’t really take seriously.

Maybe it had something to do with that relate-it-to-yourself kind of approach you are expected to use in going about the paper. It isn’t like a diary that anyone would actually be honest, now would it? I mean, how can anyone actually appreciate a relate-it-to-yourself essay with no juicy gossips in it? Seriously.

At the same time, let’s not kid each other and be blatant to say that in any reaction paper, there is only one objective of the student, to try to verbalize what the professor actually wants to hear.

Say, if it’s a seminar sort of gathering, the most common entry would be “I’ve learned a lot of things regarding this field because blah, blah, blah and I will be using it for the rest of my life.”

If it’s a testimony, “I’m really inspired to what he/she said especially when he/she talked about blah, blah, blah,” then ending it with that sort of thought provoking, emotionally appealing sentence.

On the other hand, if it’s a talk done by the teacher himself/herself, most of what might come out in the paper are points of agreement and not of disagreement. For a simple-minded high school student, why would anyone dare to disagree if you’re only aim is to get good grades.

Talking about all those high school reaction papers reminds me how I used to sweet-talk and play around with words just to make it sound “good”.

Then, why do I have to do one again? There must be more to life than this. (Imagine the bumping of the head on the wall)

Then I ask, what is the essence of a written form? Why do I actually have to write all these reaction papers in the first place? For the teacher to find out if I was actually listening to what they were saying, if that’s the only purpose I need to achieve, it makes the paper quite superficial, wasting printer inks and white paper. Think of all the trees I’ve misuse for all these nonsense. (I know. Ma’am Rara has gotten into me. I’ve become conscious of the environment. Yes, me, the patron of Ate Gloria’s take-out-in-a-styro lunch and plactic-cupped iced tea. How ironic)

It rather brings me back to media as a whole. In one of our discussions in our thesis proposal, (god. Thesis. Don’t remind me) is media a source of information? Yes, of course. However, it is not completely a source of information since it contains a lot of trash as well especially in television (and yes, in less than a year, I’ll eventually be one of those people working in the network responsible for such trash. Depressing, I know)

This makes me go back to my question. What is the essence of media? What is the purpose that media must serve?

In simple terms, to be a source of information. But unless it’s as brightly colored as Barney, it would really never sell. (I really hate Barney, that singing purple dinosaur that suggests homosexuality to children, that goes for Tinky Winky as well. What is it with the color purple in the first place? Haha, me and my children’s show angst. I call for the revival of Batibot! bwahaha)

Sell. Ratings. Business. (which reminds me of my very own business-minded, profit-oriented, marketing organization, the student council. angst. angst. angst) All these concepts deviate the media for serving its true purpose, just like that wasted reaction paper. Every space is power, and must therefore be used with responsibility. (reminds me of Spiderman. And being the Marvel fan that I am, I hate the third movie, bad)

If you had the opportunity to reach thousands of people, what will tell them? Will you say to them what they want to hear? Or what they needed to hear which will also serve the very essence of media, to make use of the space and serve its very purpose. (talk about good use of space. I just love Conrado de Quiros’ three previous columns. click here)

The reaction paper is a joke paper because I chose it to be.

Instead, make it a chance to address the issues that I think should be critical about, to be able not to conform to what everyone else is doing, to flop but make every sense of space I use up.

The reaction paper is what I want it to be; the media is what its practitioners want it to be, and never what the people wants to see, a choice and never a trap. A stage play will never be “poor” because of its audience; it’s the people who worked in it.

(Apologies for the side comments. I’m actually having fun with this. Then again, I still have to do my reaction paper. I really needed to convince myself to make good of it, now do I. Hate you Sir for this)